Eleanor, your eulogy was a model of the magic of detail to summon forth image after image of the person in action. You gave us a movie in words of your mother in all her different roles. Yet there is a through line of her personality running through it. One favorite phrase: "spilling blinking into the light of the low-beamed cottage to take over our father’s silence with our shouts."
Ellie, your eulogy was a portrait as vivid and layered as the woman in that photograph—fearless in her bowler hat, perfectly poised between elegance and rebellion. Listening to your voice just now carried the ache of goodbye, but also the avalanche of love you’ve weathered so beautifully. What a life your mum lived. So many selves, so many contradictions—all true to the bone. I’m especially grateful to her for giving us you: fierce, thoughtful, and incandescent with meaning. Thank you for letting us witness the wonder of her. xo-L
Fascinating, a long life well lived. I’d love to see some of her work — drawings or buildings. The film is wonderful, well produced and narrated, so full of hope. At what point does your mother appear?
What a wonderful tribute to your mother, Eleanor. The conundrums and paradoxes. The architect who found so many uses for string! So glad her bowler hat reappeared at just the right moment.
How amazing it is to be able to picture — not just picture, feel — an utter stranger through her daughter’s words. What a force (meaning both she and you).
I wrote and delivered the eulogy for my brother. It was a profound experience, to try to capture his presence in the world for all, express his meaning to me. It's a personal testament, not art, yet a writer will naturally use her art to do justice, and you did that in such richly detailed, evocative prose. I know from reading that your feelings are complex, but the eulogy was a last, great gift from you, the bowler to you?
What an amazing eulogy to an extraordinary life… thank you for allowing us to read and perhaps, if it isn’t too bold, to understand the ways she shaped your own life Eleanor…
Eleanor, thanks for this sentimental glance in Mom's lifetime on personal journey and goodbye letters.
PS. "I asked her, which do you prefer, Susan Walker or Lady A?
She'd say both." Her takeaway there resonates with the proverb that says although the butterfly and caterpillar are completely different but they're one and same. — The butterfly represents to be finally free, sheds light on situations the caterpillar never considered.🕊️
Thanks for letting us read such an excellent eulogy and hear of the most excellent reappearance of that bowler hat. As a modern professional lady and mom combined, she reminds us never forget what is most important in these times and to be oneself always.
That our parents had lives before we came along is strange. As kids we cannot imagine our parents with other people, doing other things in other places, and yet they did. Not everyone had as colorful and successful a life as your mom, E. What a gift to know so much about her, thank you.
Eleanor, your eulogy was a model of the magic of detail to summon forth image after image of the person in action. You gave us a movie in words of your mother in all her different roles. Yet there is a through line of her personality running through it. One favorite phrase: "spilling blinking into the light of the low-beamed cottage to take over our father’s silence with our shouts."
And I think you and her would have got on. You’d have met on art and design, words and politics and so much more besides.
Thank you, David.
Wow what a life. So many amazing details. ❤️
Ellie, your eulogy was a portrait as vivid and layered as the woman in that photograph—fearless in her bowler hat, perfectly poised between elegance and rebellion. Listening to your voice just now carried the ache of goodbye, but also the avalanche of love you’ve weathered so beautifully. What a life your mum lived. So many selves, so many contradictions—all true to the bone. I’m especially grateful to her for giving us you: fierce, thoughtful, and incandescent with meaning. Thank you for letting us witness the wonder of her. xo-L
Oh. You. xx ❤️
Fascinating, a long life well lived. I’d love to see some of her work — drawings or buildings. The film is wonderful, well produced and narrated, so full of hope. At what point does your mother appear?
She’s in the last few frames, when the camera pans on the faces listening to the speeches at the fence of Aldermaston.
What a life, what a tribute. I wish I had a bowler hat to tip to you both. Thank you.
What a wonderful tribute to your mother, Eleanor. The conundrums and paradoxes. The architect who found so many uses for string! So glad her bowler hat reappeared at just the right moment.
It was a true piece of conjury.
Yes! And her funeral sounded a perfect send-off.
You got me thinking about paradoxes. My late mum, born the same year as yours (died 2021) was a member of CND. Her sister worked at Aldermaston.
The film you linked to is fascinating.
Isn’t it great? I was so thrilled to dig it out and watch, and then see her.
A wonderful tribute, E. Love the thought of you wearing her hat all day. Love to you xxx
xxx 🎩
Thank you for sharing the brave, wild, and wonderful life that your mother lived with all of us. My deepest condolences on your loss. ❤️
Thank you
Magnificent.
How amazing it is to be able to picture — not just picture, feel — an utter stranger through her daughter’s words. What a force (meaning both she and you).
What a beautiful eulogy and a fascinating-sounding woman. I'm sorry for your loss. 🫶🏻
Thank you, Elaine
I wrote and delivered the eulogy for my brother. It was a profound experience, to try to capture his presence in the world for all, express his meaning to me. It's a personal testament, not art, yet a writer will naturally use her art to do justice, and you did that in such richly detailed, evocative prose. I know from reading that your feelings are complex, but the eulogy was a last, great gift from you, the bowler to you?
Thanks, Jay. I feel certain the bowler was her gift to me. And yes, as you know, it’s such a profound responsibility, a one shot moment.
What an amazing eulogy to an extraordinary life… thank you for allowing us to read and perhaps, if it isn’t too bold, to understand the ways she shaped your own life Eleanor…
Thanks, Susie. It’s by seeing it through others eyes that I see more.
Fiercely strong women - rare in their moment yet formed through it are hard acts. Huge respect Eleanor. Great work.
Thank you x
oh really Eleanor - thank YOU C
Eleanor, thanks for this sentimental glance in Mom's lifetime on personal journey and goodbye letters.
PS. "I asked her, which do you prefer, Susan Walker or Lady A?
She'd say both." Her takeaway there resonates with the proverb that says although the butterfly and caterpillar are completely different but they're one and same. — The butterfly represents to be finally free, sheds light on situations the caterpillar never considered.🕊️
🐛🦋
Thanks for letting us read such an excellent eulogy and hear of the most excellent reappearance of that bowler hat. As a modern professional lady and mom combined, she reminds us never forget what is most important in these times and to be oneself always.
Yes, this.
That our parents had lives before we came along is strange. As kids we cannot imagine our parents with other people, doing other things in other places, and yet they did. Not everyone had as colorful and successful a life as your mom, E. What a gift to know so much about her, thank you.
Once I knew about her life before us I always felt like that was the real her.
It was the real her before you. But you and your sibs were her real her, as well.