Absolute beast. As you well know I was posting a secret box of letters to you which was supposed to arrive like a surprise only it hasn’t yet but I’m convinced it’s going to at the exact right moment. Also I love you and you’re now going to get me I to deep hot water when everyone believes you
My old therapist, since deceased, called this "honesty dumping." And, when someone starts honesty dumping on you, he said run. I'm sure what he meant was "adopt and air of pleasantness, and then run." I wrestle with my own C-PTSD and this really summed up what goes on in my own head. Although the therapy has helped considerably with reframing.
And for the record:
I would say I used to be an honesty dumper for much of the reasons you describe above--I hate lying. I didn't have a label for what I was doing or understand the deeper why, I simply told myself I was being honest. Yikes. Forgiveness for my younger self and apologies to the random people I shared too much with.
I grew up being taught to lie. My mother doesn't trust anyone or anything, except for the Italian tv she has on all day. Anyway, she is a terrific liar and I developed the trait even further. I would even lie when I didn't have to. I still do it. I enhance.
I have an Irish friend the same. We were talking about it the other day. She lies about where she is and what flight she’s getting, it’s automatic, she can’t help it, her husband has learnt to adjust her times and dates accordingly.
Sep 12, 2023·edited Sep 12, 2023Liked by Eleanor Anstruther
Sociologist say that lying evolved because it became essential for the species to survive. Imagine everyone saying what came to them all the time? Someone truthfully answering "How was your day" or "Did you like the pie?" There is brilliant and hilarious episode on Supernatural that deals with the matter. The Nephilim Jack becomes so pissed off at humans that he makes it so no one can lie--oh the near apocalyptic destruction. Even so, we need balance... how do I not hurt a good friend's feelings and maintain the friendship. How do I even remain honest with myself without an internalize guilt trip and desire to claw my own soul...? Damn. Wish I knew. Love your philosophical takes...:-D
My mum once told me that she has never, and would never lie to me, and that if i asked her, she would tell me, no matter how dark or weird.
This is a lie. Because she once told me she was going to do some errands, when in fact she was visiting one of her secret lovers
Absolute beast. As you well know I was posting a secret box of letters to you which was supposed to arrive like a surprise only it hasn’t yet but I’m convinced it’s going to at the exact right moment. Also I love you and you’re now going to get me I to deep hot water when everyone believes you
Also obviously I have a lot of secret lovers
My truth is not anyone else’s and that confuses the issue no end !
Truth is a tyrant, lies seduce us. This is tough territory and you navigate it with style.
Thanks Jeffrey
Yh cheers Jeffrey
you are
Yh, in deep hot water with ur secret lover
👨🏻🌾
My old therapist, since deceased, called this "honesty dumping." And, when someone starts honesty dumping on you, he said run. I'm sure what he meant was "adopt and air of pleasantness, and then run." I wrestle with my own C-PTSD and this really summed up what goes on in my own head. Although the therapy has helped considerably with reframing.
And for the record:
I would say I used to be an honesty dumper for much of the reasons you describe above--I hate lying. I didn't have a label for what I was doing or understand the deeper why, I simply told myself I was being honest. Yikes. Forgiveness for my younger self and apologies to the random people I shared too much with.
Forgiveness for my younger self, too.
I grew up being taught to lie. My mother doesn't trust anyone or anything, except for the Italian tv she has on all day. Anyway, she is a terrific liar and I developed the trait even further. I would even lie when I didn't have to. I still do it. I enhance.
I have an Irish friend the same. We were talking about it the other day. She lies about where she is and what flight she’s getting, it’s automatic, she can’t help it, her husband has learnt to adjust her times and dates accordingly.
Did she grow up Catholic? I think southern Italians and Irish Catholics share a lot of traits!
Yes, Catholic
That'll do it.
I am most leary of people convinced that the truth is easy to know.
My solution to this was to co-write nine series of a sitcom
Yh the office is one of the greats, so fortunate to have a genius like you write that incredible show
Xx
Thanks mate. Never felt I got the credit I deserve for the adventures of David Brent and his crazy crew, much appreciated
Especially for coming up with the whole “i am your father shtick” from that star trek thingy
yeah quite a laboured solution
My God, if I shared everything in my head I never would have been let out 😬
Sociologist say that lying evolved because it became essential for the species to survive. Imagine everyone saying what came to them all the time? Someone truthfully answering "How was your day" or "Did you like the pie?" There is brilliant and hilarious episode on Supernatural that deals with the matter. The Nephilim Jack becomes so pissed off at humans that he makes it so no one can lie--oh the near apocalyptic destruction. Even so, we need balance... how do I not hurt a good friend's feelings and maintain the friendship. How do I even remain honest with myself without an internalize guilt trip and desire to claw my own soul...? Damn. Wish I knew. Love your philosophical takes...:-D
These are all essential and impossible questions. Wish I knew too. Thanks Alicia